Weekly Letter: Nice vs Real

When I moved into my apartment 20 years ago, the downstairs neighbor Tiffany and I quickly became friends. She’s someone I felt immediately connected to, like a sister.

The first time I went into her apartment, she said, ‘Excuse the mess, but I live here.’ It’s funny, her apartment wasn’t messy, but I loved how she honored her own humanity. She wasn’t pretending to live as though Architectural Digest was about to come knocking and I have found myself using that line in my own home more than once.

To me, Tiffany was real and I think that’s why I felt so connected to her so quickly. There was no game, no formality, no vetting.

Real is honest. Nice is fake. Nice has expectations of an image with rules designed by some false paradigm. Nice can be broken.

And what’s even more interesting is, this concept usually gets me one angry email. I’m ready.  😊

~Carmen

PS: Tiffany is now a yoga teacher in Galesburg, Ill at Lavender Lotus Studio. And yes, we're still friends.